THE HERMITAGE MUSEUM, ST PETERSBURG



Anybody who happened to catch the innovative, jaw-dropping opus that was 2002 film Russian Ark will attest to the magnificence of St. Petersburg's spectacular Hermitage Museum. The Winter Palace, ancestral compound of the Romanov dynasty and Peter the Great's historical residence houses a spectacular collection of paintings, sculpture and artifacts plus an eye-popping array of interiors exquisite enough to put any royal family to shame.

The Hermitage takes a solid seven hours to waltz through - and it pays to prioritise certain wings of the extensive complex as theres no way to get the full monty in one day. Initially we wandered gingerly through the opulent rooms, each one more awesome than the last, until we were almost yawning - desensitised to the overwhelming razzamattazz of it all. Richly gilded ornamentation, delicate plaster detailing, luxurious drapery and spectacular chandeliers created a visual cacophony, a veritable Wonka factory for the interior aesthetics nerd. It felt impossible not to let our imaginations get carried away within these incredible spaces and get a sense of meaning behind the eventual revolt against such a decadent monarchy.

With a collection spanning over three millions works, we a beat a retreat for the Russian and western European art sections after ogling those magnificent interiors. Featuring works from the likes of Picasso, Matisse and Chagall, the exhibits were extensive...though I suspected the creme of the Western European crop had already been snapped up by the French and Italian national galleries.

The Hermitage felt more like an overall experience, than a museum and its rich combination of royal history, architecture, interiors and art enabled a real insight into the very heart the Eastern European cultural landscape. 

THE CHROME DOMES OF OLDE MOCKBA

No I don't mean thick set, intimidating, bald Soviet men, I'm referring of course to the Russian capital's skyline, many of it's finest churches decorated with iconic onion domes of all styles. Predominantly shimmering gold or often tiled (below), domes also appear painted in striking matt green and blue colours. Moscow's churches create a dramatic aesthetic, your eye inevitably drawn towards towards God as you squint blindly, muttering about crow's feet as you try to absorb the curvaceous harmony of a dome's structure.

Often the thick-walled church interiors proved to be small and austere in design, far outweighed by the immense scale of the exterior domes. St. Basil's (below) was an exception according to my travelling amigo, who returned awe-inspired after viewing the interior while I haggled again with crazy old poster man back at Izmailovsky market to replace our lost wares. These beautiful orthodox buildings were often tucked away in tiny Muscovite alleyways, their vibrant pastel colour schemes appearing oasis-like amidst chaotic modern scaffolding - only after we had taken several bum steers and almost given up hope of ever deciphering the local street signs.

The dome shape is said to resemble a burning candle, its religious symbolism obvious, though there are many theories as to the significance, if any of the design. The onion dome is synonymous of course with traditional Russian architecture and the aesthetic charm of many of Moscow's finest certainly put the dour interiors of a lot of poor old (and now bankrupt) England's churches in the shade.    

ЧЕРНЫЙ ЧЕРНЫЙ ЧЕРНЫЙ

Bonjour mes amies, tis your humble correspondent back from the dead...arrrggghh just want to put Russia to bed now since this one's been a long time coming...have been otherwise engaged with all manner of psychodrama...will roll out the domes domes domes imminently but first heres my fave piece from the Hermitage...this delectable lady in black (apologies for the dreaded reflection) :)

  

IZMAILOVSKY FLEA MARKET

So we reached a complete and total Ware Nirvana when we finally hit the fabled old Izmailovsky flea market in Moscow's north eastern suburbs. Having wandering aimlessly for a good three hours after a bum steer from the famously incomprehensible Moscow underground system (or was it me?), we finally followed a trickle of colourful local folk sniffin' bargains heading towards the market through the spectacular entrance gate below.

Izmailovsky seemed predominantly a tourist trap, every second stall flogging colourful nesting dolls and tacky souvenirs. We stumbled upon a fantastic old nut scratcher driving a very hard bargain at the rear however, selling row upon row of original Commie propaganda posters. After much energetic banter and theatrical disappearances we finally settled on a price for two beautiful posters - the piece de resistance of our Russian wares haul. I chose the one below for its pretty femininity (there was no way I was putting an enormous red Stalin on me wall) and its significant date as an International Womens' Day celebration in eastern Europe. The fact that I then went and left it on the overnight train from Petersburg to Tula is neither here nor there...merely another illustration of my numbskullery.

The market also sold an array of typically Russki fayre such as the authentic furs below. Vegetarian? Animal rights activist? I'm so sorry. In this country computer says no.

  

RUSSIAN FEMME FATALES

Russian ladies...a peculiar breed...each and every one of them got serious swag and rocking their own particular sartorial vibe. We were astounded by the preponderance of young ones who truly were blessed with supermodel genetics and the older ones that were styling it up on a babushka/gypsy/Rocky Horror Transylvanian tip. Young or old...they all very clearly knew their way around the local cosmetics counter, hairdresser, beauty parlour and discount clothing emporium. Hooray for Capitalism!

RUSSIAN BOOK ARTIST MIKHAIL KARASIK

A definite highlight of our Far Eastern European extravaganza was discovering the quirky work of Mikhail Karasik in the Avant-Garde Museum, St. Petersburg. Karasik is a leading exponent of the Russian 'artist book' movement - creating unique handmade books that combine literature, art and design in low print runs (usually less than 20). Karasik utilises graphic imagery and pop-style colours often fused with lithographs created in his own studio. The books are pieces of unique, idiosyncratic art (each edition slightly varied) yet also literary texts to be read. 

The Avant-Garde show featured large prints of the artist's work, each piece immediately suggesting a recognisably 'Russian' aesthetic. Karasik's early 20th c constructivist and futurist influences are obvious, however his treatment is far more humorous, the colour palette softer and lighter. His sepia and pastel tones modernise the stark, aggressive gravity of the communist reds and blacks of Constructivist Alexander Rodchenko's style. Karasik uses iconic Russian imagery in a playful, absurd way - Red Square's creepy Lenin Mausoleum given a vibrant pink sky, while Lenin and a bearded crony are given a summer holiday vibe as they chillax in a beautiful garden.

See more of Karasik's brilliant work here.



ITS RAINING MENSKIS...HALLELUJAH

The streets of Russia seemed to be perversely awash with fresh meat in uniform. Sailor boys a dime a dozen sauntered around the waterfront streets of Petersburg while surly-looking army types paraded manfully across Red Square. Even Police Academy boys roamed the streets in packs sporting fetching double-denim Canadian Tuxedoes* and saucy baseball caps. Eminating that sexy yet mildly intimidating whiff of authority, these young bucks ruled the streets knowing they come from a country where the men are real men and the women are glad about it. Judging by the numerous, sweet and feverish public displays of affection we witnessed from the young men toward their birds...maybe thats not a bad thing.

* Canadian Tuxedo (c) Mal Saymontry 2008...revolting double demin ensemble often sported by redneck North Americans